When children share and talk with you, parents must pay attention to it and give a positive response. I sorted out why children are not willing to talk to their parents. Please refer to it.
Why don't children want to talk to their parents
In order not to hurt their parents' feelings
Many parents may have difficulty understanding this. Many parents feel that their children are still young. They don't know how to hurt or not.
In fact, children are very sensitive and even more mature and sensible than their parents in some aspects. Some children wrote in diaries and forums:
"I know it's not good to say this, but I really think they don't love me, but use me to compare and get those ridiculous pride. They just impose on me the life they don't have the opportunity to experience and the ideals they don't have the opportunity to realize. I can't feel the feeling of love, but feel that they are selfish..."
If children express their inner anger and dissatisfaction with their parents frankly, many parents will find it difficult to accept, or get angry and scold their children for "ungrateful", or use "I'm all for your own good", convince their children with various reasons, or feel sorry for themselves and cry about their kind feelings for their children Kind of pay
In order not to hurt their parents, many children learn to hide their minds at a young age.
Reduce further harm from parents
Children are unwilling to communicate with their parents. Closing their hearts is also a kind of self-protection. For this reason, many parents will defend: how can I hurt my child? Everything I do is for his good.
There was a 10-year-old child who didn't want to go to school and needed his mother to coax him to go to school and do his homework every day. Later, with the increase of academic difficulty, children have no motivation to learn. Children are completely unwilling to go to school and often lie to their parents. It is useless for parents to persuade and encourage them.
During the consultation, the child talked with his mother separately. The child mentioned to the consultant that his mother took good care of his life and didn't let him do anything. He often talked to him and asked him what he wanted. But what she really wants and wants to do, her mother doesn't understand, is not interested, and is often not allowed. For example, she wants to play with her children after school and then go home, but her mother always feels unsafe outside. She has to go home and let her parents know before she can play with her children after finishing her homework.
But when the child finishes his homework, his mother thinks it's better to preview tomorrow's homework. Over time, children are unwilling to express their ideas, and there is no way to convince their parents, because parents are for their own good, but they are more disgusted with learning, and gradually they are unwilling to study and go to school.
When children are no longer one or two years old, they already have their own independent thoughts, consciousness and desire, and parents often feel that their children are still young, hold an attitude of disrespect and contempt for their children's ideas and practices, and often deny their children's ideas, which is easy to stab those growing up and eager for maturity, resulting in children's unwillingness to open their hearts to their parents. Even if they communicate, they just talk about ordinary trivial things, Not from the heart.
Parents' attention to their children is too narrow
With the development of society, there are great differences in the way children play with their parents, but this generation still has different values. This leads to inconsistencies in the concerns and concerns of children and parents.
In today's era, the pressure of reality makes parents feel the importance of education, so they will emphasize the importance of learning intentionally or unintentionally. Even some parents only ask their children to study well, and all other things are arranged by their parents.
Parents' anxiety about their children's future and emphasis on their studies will inadvertently ignore their children's emotional and spiritual needs. This attitude gradually creates an irreparable gap between parents and children. Children will think that parents only care about their own achievements, not really themselves. It is conditional to feel their parents' love for themselves.
In addition, some parents are not good at learning, unwilling to understand new things and can't keep up with the pace of the times. Many parents don't understand the words like "god horse, dinosaur and prawn", but ignore these words.