Many primary school parents often complain that their children are unwilling to do their homework and have tried hard and soft methods for their children, but there is no effect. Parents are very distressed. I sorted out why children don't want to do their homework?, Welcome to learn from.
Why don't children do their homework?
First, don't worry. Understand children.
Children who have just entered primary school have a lot to learn; Getting used to doing homework is one of the requirements, and it is normal to fail to do it in place. Parents need not be so anxious. Some children have better adaptability, while others are worse. First of all, we should hold an attitude of understanding, not an attitude of criticism.
In the final analysis, we parents can't go to school instead of our children. We should let our children understand that learning and doing homework are their own things, good or bad; Whether the homework is good or bad requires him to bear the consequences. The role of parents is only to guide, inspire and remind him, and tell him these reasons when the child is calm.
Case:
I always said to Dabao, "Mom and dad's job is to take good care of you and Xiaobao and create a better environment for you. Your job is to study hard. I don't ask you to get 100 points, but you must go all out to study and do your best. I'm sure I'm happy to get 100 points, but I'm just as happy if you try your best."
Second, we should analyze why children are unwilling to do their homework, and then apply the right medicine to the case.
Case:
Dabao refused to do his homework in those years because the homework was repeated mechanically. It was unreasonable to ask children to write another 20 times for a word they already knew how to write. Now when children go to preschool, they have learned a lot of the contents of the first grade textbooks in advance. Many first grade assignments repeat the previous content. Dabao always told me wrongly that I would have written this word long ago. In this case, Bao's father usually rushed up to save his daughter: "Dad, help you write it.". Dabao always rushes up happily to hold her father. At that time, I also thought that father Bao was a little too fond of children. Would it make Dabao a habit of dependence? But now, maybe it is Bao's father's attitude that makes Dabao feel understood. Now even if she meets words that can be written, she will write them one by one and maintain an interest in learning.
Another possibility is that the homework is too difficult. When I communicated with Dabao's teachers, I felt that it was not easy for teachers now. Yes, the State advocates quality education, but what is used to evaluate teachers in the end? Or achievements, because only achievements can be seen and touched. Therefore, teachers have to assign a large number of difficult homework in order to improve students' performance, so that students in grade two of primary school also have to do a large number of test papers and counseling materials before the examination.
My father and I both went to college in the 1980s and 1990s. When we were young, where did we have any teaching aids? Therefore, I have always been indifferent to the homework beyond Dabao's age requirements, such as handwritten newspaper. Let her look like what she can do within her ability. There is no need to force her to do it.
III. don't use violence or rude language, and don't manage children too carefully and completely.
It is normal for parents to worry when children don't do their homework, but they must not use beating children or sarcasm to solve problems. My friend told me that sometimes I was annoyed by my son and would beat my son several times a day. I strongly opposed it. October pregnancy painstakingly gave birth to a child, not to beat him.
On the other hand, I also strongly oppose cold violence - that is, to communicate with children in ironic (e.g. "if you can, you don't have to do your homework"), abusive (e.g. "I haven't seen such a stupid person"), nagging (e.g. "why don't you do your homework, how many times have I said it"), begging (e.g. "please do your homework quickly"). Maybe the child is just lazy occasionally, but the parents repeatedly remind the child to dislike it. He will feel that homework is not my business, but my parents' business.
Case:
Dabao once forgot to do his homework in preschool class and cried on Sunday night. I said she had three choices: write right away, get up early tomorrow morning, don't write to the school and tell the teacher to forget. Finally, she chose to get up and write early the next morning. Even so, she was late for school that morning.
Since then, as long as the weekend, I just need to tell her: "mom only reminds you once, finish your homework early, and don't write it again on Sunday night". As for when to write what, it's her own business. It's up to her to arrange it. There's no need to manage it too much and too carefully.
When I pick up Dabao at the school gate, I often see parents compare what homework the teacher asks to do today. If a child doesn't know how to record his homework after a day's class and needs his mother to do these things, what else can the children do?
Fourth, we should communicate more with teachers.
A good teacher can change one's life. For lower grade children, the teacher's words have to grow up with the family, so more communication with the teacher can lead the child to a healthy life track.
Case:
Dabao learned a word "sound" in grade one, and the teacher asked him to preview it. Dabao looked up the dictionary and formed a "modern sound" (opposite to "ancient sound", which means today's tone, etc.). The next day, Dabao said to me with a sad face, "Mom, I got an X in my homework.". As soon as I saw it, I began to communicate with the teacher without saying a word. Fortunately, the teacher was open-minded and told me that the reason for typing X was because he was afraid that the children's group would be too unfamiliar with words. If the teacher didn't know and didn't look up the dictionary, he would directly make a mistake. It's better for lower grade pupils to master the usage of commonly used words. I can understand, but I told the teacher to take care of Dabao's learning enthusiasm of actively looking up the dictionary. Compared with the score of a certain exam, I pay more attention to children's interest and confidence in autonomous learning.
After this communication, the teacher anonymously praised Dabao's initiative to look up words in the dictionary in class the next day, and Dabao's interest in learning Chinese became higher and higher. In fact, teachers also need more communication and feedback from parents. Only in this way can she (he) know the teaching effect and find a better teaching method.
V. have confidence in your children and praise your children more.
I can't remember which educator said, "every child is a genius". The problem is that impatient parents and teachers often "succeed" in educating a genius into a "mediocre talent" and pushing a child to failure.
Looking back on our own growth process, is everything done well and impeccable? When children encounter problems in their growth, what they need is their parents' patience, guidance and creative way of education, and what they need is their parents' firm confidence in him or her. I said to my friend, "I don't believe your son is good for nothing. He must be worthy of your praise and affirmation. Sincerely praise what he has done well, and then make a reasonable plan for him, he will enjoy school life very much."
The correct way for parents to accompany
① it is unfair for children to think that their parents are playing and they have to learn.
If we adults watch TV or play with mobile phones while supervising our children, and keep nagging: "write fast", "don't procrastinate", "don't watch TV, study hard". At this time, the child was very unhappy: "why can you watch TV? I can't watch it. It's really unfair."