Can't forget, what should I do

Annoying advertising slogans haunt and echo in my mind; After watching horror movies, those terrible scenes are hard to erase in my memory for a while. In life, many people will have such an experience. For most people, the feeling of this experience gradually fades over time. For some people, this experience has become too "solid" memory and is plagued by it. What should I do?

Let me forget!

"Unforgettable" is a double-edged sword. Sometimes it will give us the most effective protection, and sometimes it will bring us lingering pain.

In ancient times, our ancestors had no books, newspapers or television. They wanted to know what animals in nature were dangerous and what plants were poisonous. Most of them came from personal experience. The process of fighting with the enemy made them pay a high price. Naturally, the longer they remember, the better.

During the first World War, the casualty rate of soldiers was as high as 56%. Many soldiers who survive by chance also suffer from a mental disease called "Bomb shock syndrome". They will constantly recall the scene of the death of their comrades in arms. They have nightmares and can't sleep at night. Finally, they will completely lose their combat ability and even can't live a normal life. The trauma brought by war causes a new disease, which is called traumatic stress syndrome (PTSD). In the Vietnam War, the incidence of PTSD was more obvious. Unforgettable painful memories not only make patients unable to live normally, but also lead to serious suicidal tendencies, which also imposes a great burden on the society.

"Force" to forget?

Painful memories linger. What can we do to forget them quickly? Say to yourself, "I want to forget it, forget it, forget it!" Will it work?

"Force" to forget will only be counterproductive, which is called "rebound effect after depression" in psychology. It was first proposed by Harvard psychologist Daniel weigeller. He did a famous "white bear experiment": he divided the participants into two groups. At the beginning, he mentioned "white bear" to both groups. However, he asked the first group to never think about things related to the "white bear" in the next five minutes, while the second group had no such limit. After five minutes, let the two groups think freely. However, once the idea of "white bear" flashed, ring the bell to report. Guess which group rings the bell more often? Group one! That is, the frequency of ringing in the group experiencing depression was significantly higher than that in the second group. Let them not think, they think more.

In fact, "remembering" and "forgetting" are such an unequal process. We can remember some things, a string of numbers and a text through short-term efforts. However, it is difficult to forget one thing in a short time.

A moment to remember

In the face of those fear memories that want to be forgotten and affect normal life, is there any way for psychologists to help PTSD patients? Contrary to the "rebound effect after depression", doctors use the method of making patients "think" to achieve the therapeutic effect of "forgetting". This is "exposure therapy" or "testimony therapy".

The doctor arranged some scenes in the patient's memory, and asked the patient to start meditating on the memories that annoyed them. After repeated "exposure", the anxiety, fear and other negative emotions caused by these fear memories decreased significantly, and with the progress of treatment, the situation that you want to forget will gradually disappear.

"Testimony therapy" is similar. Doctors ask witnesses who have been attacked or witnessed violence to dictate the process of violence and provide their "testimony" like testifying in court. After this treatment, the psychological trauma caused by the memory of violent events will be significantly weakened.